That messy look caught my attention.

Found You [Sungkyunkwan Scandal OST]

"I fell in love with you on a bleak rainy day

because you pointed to the sun

when all I saw were dark clouds."

....................

It wasn't a waste of time

if you learned something.

....................

"I hope one day 

someone asks you

about him

and you laugh

instead of feeling

a double edged

dagger on your chest."

.....................

In my history of watching drama, I have watched two sageuk (Korean historical drama) series just because of him. Why? Because I find that he looks much more charming and way more attractive being messy and wearing the traditional Korean clothes. Yeah, I know my definition of charming is weird but hey, everyone is entitled to their own opinion, right?  

And guess what, a new sageuk drama series is currently aired with him in it.  But that drama has 50 episodes! Arghhhh that's a lot of episodes I tell ya. Should I or should I not? Aishhh, this rebellious namja. Aishhh.

: 19th November 2015.

: 10.20 p.m.

: Jeli, Kelantan.

: Today, at school, a teacher suddenly asked me a question
and persistently wanted me to answer it.

I ended up feeling bad for lying.
But you will too if you are in my shoes.

"So...what do we do now?"

You are my destiny [Lyn]

"Never, in all of the seventy billion humans who have walked this planet since the beginning of time has there been anyone exactly like you. Never, until the end of time, will there be another such as you. You have shown no knowledge or appreciation of your uniqueness. Yet, you are the rarest thing in the world."

- Og Mandino, The Greatest Miracle in World.

.........................

Last week, all schools in Kelantan had quite a long holiday from Tuesday until Saturday; thanks to Deepavali celebration and Hari Keputeraan Sultan Kelantan (sorry, I am too lazy to think of the English term for this). Usually, I would be more than ecstatic to go home and spend my days lazing around in Penang. However, this time, that was not the case.

I decided not to go home but instead, I went to Dungun. "What's with Dungun?", people around me asked. Oh well, it's not the place that made me want to go there in the first place. Rather, it's the person who is there. She is none other than my petite friend with a big heart; Miss Pencinta Kucing. 

A few days before my journey, I already googled the way to Dungun. I wanted to use LPT (East Coast Highway) so that the journey will take less than 4 hours. However, the moment I mentioned that, some of the teachers told me not to use LPT as there were a lot of ghost stories about the highway. I was okay at first however, as I will be driving alone, the fact that there will be less cars along the highway and the cases where people were robbed that they had told me were making my heart a bit restless. It's not that I am scared of ghosts in particular, but rather, I am quite worried if I will be targeted by 'road robbers' once they notice me--a girl, driving alone. Seriously, as the day getting nearer, my heart was not at peace. I felt like I wanted to cancel the whole trip and go back to Penang instead.

However, the night before the journey, a thought came across my mind. The Gerik road that I always use to go back to Penang is similar to LPT in the sense that there are less cars and there are also a lot of stories (ghosts and robbers alike). Instead of fearing the unknowns, I better pray hard to Allah so that He will protect me from any harm. Even so, I need to make sure that there will be no strange looking car following me. So, with that in mind, I pursued my initial plan. Dungun, here I come!

I thank Allah for giving me the courage and for protecting me from any harm because...coming to Dungun was one of the best decisions I have ever taken this year. I got to spend my days talking about all sorts of things with my dear friend. I got to taste her cooking (the last time I tasted her sardine was when we were in the U.K). I got to sleep on a big comfy bed. I got to watch TV (I have no TV in Jeli, I only depend on my laptop and hard disk). I got to see her school (it was a big school). I got to watch The Spectre in cinema (Kelantan is yet to have a cinema). I got to eat a lot of things in Dungun (we ate quite a big portion for just two of us; girls). I got to transfer more drama series and movies from her collection to my hard disk (I have Full House and Sungkyunkwan Scandal, yeaaaaaaahhhh). 

And the moment I was back in Jeli, I felt a tinge of sadness and loneliness. Now I kinda understand the feeling of leaving someone you care and love. I salute those who are in LDR (long distance relationship). I used to be so cold years ago but I guess I have such a soft heart now. Should I put the blame on my old age?

.........................

"You may forget someone you laughed with,

but you will never forget someone you cried with."

[Gibran Khalil Gibran]

: 15th November 2015.

: 3.50 p.m.

: Jeli, Kelantan.

: I managed to get her to watch 'I Hear Your Voice'

and now, she is falling in love with Park Soo Ha too.

See, I told ya. Lee Jong Suk has put a spell on us.

Let me fangirl for a while.

Why did you come? 
Where were you?

It seems like it’s a bit late 
but we finally meet

Do you believe in love?

Is this fate?

I keep hearing sweet words

You’re smiling in front of me,

I tightly hold your hand next to you

I look at you with eyes overflowing with love

A song automatically comes out

with my especially light steps. 
Is it because

it resembles you? 
This melody is beautiful

Why do I keep smiling?

Why do I keep looking at my phone?

People around me keep saying that I changed

Why am I like this?

Why do I keep thinking of you?

I guess the love I dreamed of is you

Why did you come now?

Why Did You Come Now- I Hear Your Voice OST [Jung Yup]

.....................

Seriously, what should I do to keep him away from my heart?

I feel like keeping him in my pocket. Aishhh.

This is getting out of hand now.

: 7th November 2015.

: 10.30 p.m.

: Jeli, Kelantan.

: How can he look so cute when he is at the same age as me?
And how can he just enter my heart without my permission?
I guess I am crazy now. I should get a grip of my life.

My heart goes dugeun dugeun.

Because of you, this heart of mine goes thump thump [Sunny Hill]

It was the same day like any other. The weather was unpredictable and I was mentally tired after long hours in the school. My body felt exhausted, too exhausted beyond words. Ironically, my mind was wide awake. I planned for a short nap (yeah right), however, no matter how well I plan, He is indeed the best planner. I lay on my bed, forcing my eyes to shut so that I could get a nap. I tossed on the bed, lulling myself to sleep. To my dismay, I couldn't fall asleep. 

So, instead of wasting my time trying to get a nap, I switched on my laptop. What should I watch today, I wonder. A new drama series? Or one random episode of Running Man? I just couldn't decide. After some time passed, I chose the latter instead of the former. Great. Now, which episode? Which guest should I watch? Hurm, Lee Dong Wook? Watched him already. Ji Sung? Yeah, watched him twice. Kim So Hyun? Hurm, not today. Ahhhh, Lee Jong Suk! I haven't watched him since his latest drama Pinocchio early this year. Ahhhhh, Lee Jong Suk and that boyish smiles. I guess Lee Jong Suk will do.

And, after an hour watching him with Song Ji Hyo trying to accomplish the Secret Couple mission in Running Man Episode 181, I find myself browsing through his videos; from Running Man episode to his drama series. 

 I seriously like the background song they use for every interaction that these two have.

And without me realising it, I have finished watching Pinocchio (again) and Doctor Stranger (urgh that drama was such a flop, I only watched his part) and now I am watching I Hear Your Voice. 

One thing about this namja is his smitten smiles. Aishhh I have such a soft spot for that kind of smiles. Of course Gong Yoo has the best smitten smiles (for me) but every time Lee Jong Suk smiles, I feel like my screen is literally exploding with rainbows and unicorns. Aishhh this namja. What spell have you put on me?

Look at how this smile is invading my train of thoughts these few days.

........................

"The people who left you did not understand how to love you. 

This does not mean you are unloveable. 

It means not everyone is equipped to handle the extraordinary."

......................

We mature with the damage,

not with the years.

: 5th November 2015.

: 6.50 p.m.

: Jeli, Kelantan.

: Seriously Lee Jong Suk is not my type,

but why he is now in my heart?

Get a grip dear heart. Wake up!