Don't worry.

Don't worry.

I don't mind.

Besides, I'm very glad to do so.
At least, I can be of help to you.

And at least, the heavy load won't be that heavy anymore.

I will try my best to do everything that I can to help decreasing it, even a bit.

Perhaps it never does, but please, don't feel that way.

It's never been a burden at all, never,

because for me,

it's actually the other way around.

Thanks for letting me to be there.

Just don't worry.

Everything's going to be fine.

We both know that it won't be raining forever.

There will be the day when the sun will shine bright,

and you will see that a beautiful rainbow is smiling at you.

On that day, let us find the end of the rainbow together.

They say that there is a pot of gold at each end of the rainbow.

Promise me, you'll take one,
and I will take the other one.

We will definitely be the richest persons on earth for sure!
So, don't worry.
Until that day comes,
let me hold your hands,
even just for a while.

....

This song is for you. Just please don't kill me after you listen to it. 

I know I should fine a better one but I find that this song is really, erm, annoyingly cute. 

Hahahaha. Please don't kill me.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1RJC5r6upAU

: 28th March 2010.

: Plymouth, U.K.

: It's Daylight Saving again, guys! And it made my day a beautiful mess. 

I just lost an hour, and as a result I lost my mind. Haha. 

I was blurred most of the time today. 

To all my friends, I'm deeply sorry for being so. 

It just an hour, yeah, it just an hour. 

I should keep reminding myself that.

The melancholy of the melody.

I am indeed a very lucky person.

God blesses me with talented and wonderful friends.

Those who never stop wrapping me with their warmth and love.

Those who never ever stop filling me with their smiles and happiness.

And those who share the sweet melody that they sang in their heart.

I am deeply blessed.

I really am.

The melody makes me wander off to the places that I long to,

reminds me of the people that I lost touch,

and brings the feeling of both melancholy and happiness that I search deep in my heart.

Thank you for bringing all those feelings and emotion back.

I might not be able to feel the same anymore,

but you have successfully remind me on how did it feel back then.

This melancholic melody in my heart reminds me of this song: 

'Arekara' by Shimokawa Mikuni

: 25th March 2010.

: Plymouth, U.K.

: You remind me of all that. 
I know I should not feel that way, but no matter what you do, you just remind me of those days. 
And no matter how melancholic the feeling is, I never want to stop feeling so.

Read and read and read.

For these past few days, I spent almost all my leisure time doing nothing but reading.
I was an avid reader before, but as time goes by, my passion towards reading is decreasing little by little. Until to the extent that I did not even touch a single book at all.
Only after one incident, I realised that I must continue reading.
Well, put aside reading manga (Japanese comics). I don't really consider reading manga as a real reading here. (Because I actually spend my every one hour reading manga everyday! Haha)I have read a couple of books now, and I am really happy doing so.
Because books are the best companions that I have right now. They often have the right words that I always search for. They always have the power to help me escape from this wild world. They never stop providing all the essence of knowledge and inspiration that I need. They are the best!
Besides, isn't reading the first thing that God urges us to?

"Bacalah dengan nama Tuhanmu yang menciptakan. Yang menciptakan manusia dari segumpal darah." [Al-Alaq: 1-2]

: 24th March 2010.

: Plymouth, U.K.

: I miss my books back there in my little room in Malaysia. 
Those are the books that cannot be replaced by any other books that I have in my hands now.

Fair enough.

Treat others like you want others to treat you.

A common saying that almost all of us know about it, or at least heard of it.

Well, easy said than done right?

Most of us practise this saying in their life, hoping that others will also practise the same as well.

But, in reality, not all are practising the same principle.

They might not treat us like how we treat them.

We might be good towards them, but we can't guarantee that they will do the same towards us.

They are they, and we are we.

That makes all the difference.

I don't like others to break their promises with me,

 but somehow, I had also broken a few promises before.

I hate it when others are being selfish and self-centred,

but when I think again, I had also been a selfish person myself.

I don't like others to be cold towards me without telling me why,

but when I reflect, I found that I had also given a cold shoulder to others before.

Things that I don't like others to do it to me, I myself had done it to others.

That's why people keep doing the things that we don't others to do to us.

It's because we ourselves do the same things to them.

Fair enough right?

So, this saying is actually not as easy as we think it is.

Yup, like I mentioned before, easy said than done.

But, hey, no matter how difficult it is, it is not impossible to do.

Let us begin to treat others nicely from now on.

If we don't want others to treat us like that, we must not treat them the same way.

Well, it doesn't matter whether they treat us well in return,

because the most important thing is,

we had treated them well.

Even if others don't see it, as long as deep in our heart we know that we had tried our best to treat them well, it is more than enough.

As long as in God's eyes, we had done our best.

He knows and He will reward us according to our deeds.

Isn't God's reward is the best reward ever?

(Be good towards others!)

"Sesungguhnya di bumi Allah ini terdapat bejana-bejana, iaitu hati-hati (hambaNya). Yang paling disayangiNya ialah yang paling lembut, paling jernih, paling teguh. Yang paling teguh berpegang kepada agama, yang paling jernih dalam keyakinannya dan paling lembut kepada sahabatnya." [Sabda Nabi S.A.W]

: 20th March 2010.

: Plymouth, U.K.

: I received two bowls of delicious food by my friends today. 
I'm so touched, seriously! Thanks! May Allah bless you guys. 
I'm proud having you guys as my friends. Thank you Allah.

Every cloud has its silver lining.

Indeed, every cloud has its silver lining.

And behind every mishap, there's always a blessing in disguise.

It's just us who can't see it.

So, everytime you face a problem, take a deep breath.

Held your head high and look up to the sky.

No matter how cloudy the day is, sooner or later, the sun will shine brightly.

And no matter how heavy the rain is, sooner or later, it will eventually stop.

See, it's just the matter of time.

So, take a deep breath and move forward.

Wonderful days are ahead of you!

: 18th March 2010.

: Plymouth, U.K.

: Just finished disturbing Miss Penggemar Susu while she was doing her assignment. 

Hehe, Miss Penggemar Susu, all the best!

A bad day.

A very bad beginning to a very bad day.

And a very weak me is just very weak indeed.

All I need is just a warm hug.

Not more than that.

"Barangsiapa Allah mahukan kebaikan untuknya, nescaya Dia akan mengujinya dengan kesusahan." [Maksud Hadis]

: 16th March 2010.

: Plymouth, U.K.

: I'm just being a real stupid for these past few days. Really stupid.

A mistake.

A mistake.

Just a simple mistake,

enough to ruin everything.

Yes, it is a mistake.

No other explanation suits the most.

I know you are hurt.
Because I just couldn't see your smile anymore.

You see, no matter how much smiles I put on my face,
 I am also as hurt as you.

We both are.

Even we are not that close to share this hurt and pain,

I just want you to know

that deep in my heart,

how I wish you are not hurt.

Let it be just me.
At least I can see your smiling face again.

Well, to forgive and forget is not what everyone can do.

But if they can't, why can't we?

Let this be a lesson.

Our lesson.

So, let us leave everything to Him and smile.
It won't be that lonely and deppressing if we smile together, right?

" Gomennasai. Sorry. I'm really sorry."

: 12th March 2010.

: Plymouth, U.K.

: Somehow, my brain was and is still completely blank 
and my room seemed to be a little bit smaller when I entered it this morning.
 Is it because of the lighting or is it just my imagination?

Tomorrow

...
Just a little while more before I can talk to you.

I have hold myself back from talking to you for these past few weeks.

Well, maybe you thought I was too busy to even ring you.

But actually, I myself who purposely did not even make any effort.

I'm waiting for the right time to call you.

I'm waiting for the right day to talk to you.

I just want to talk to you non-stop...

tomorrow.

Yes, tomorrow.

Why tomorrow?

Because tomorrow, the SPM result is finally out.

Because tomorrow is the red day for all of us.

Because tomorrow, my brother will receive his result.

That's why I choose tomorrow.

Not because I have forgotten all of you.

It's because I care so much about all of you.

You don't know how much I miss you.

Please wait, tomorrow I will definitely call.

I will, insyaAllah.

Until then, please pray for me.
Mak, Abah, please pray for all of us.

: 10th March 2010.

: Plymouth, U.K.

: It's so cold and hot at the same time recently. 
I just miss Malaysia's weather so much. 
On top of that, I miss my family so damn much.

In love?

Love. There's so much too say about love.
What's your definition of love then?

Too many people try to embrace the real meaning of love.
They try hard to search for their true love.
Some might have already found their love,
while some might still in the search of their true love.
Because for most, love means happiness, love means joy.
That's why they constantly seek for it.
But, less they know that,
love doesn't come with happiness alone,
but it also comes together with jealousy, misunderstanding, lies and tears.
That's why people in love aren't always engulf in happiness.
See, no matter how you put it,
apart from bringing happiness and joy,
love also brings misery, isn't it?
And being in loved is not always lovely, isn't it?

But hey, no matter what love brings,
don't ever stop loving.
Because love makes us who we are now.
It's the love from God that makes us still alive.
Isn't love powerful?

Despite being completely helpless at times,

You will always be there. Thanks to You, I now know the meaning of love.

: 08th March 2010.

: Plymouth, U.K.

: No matter who do you love, 

don't ever let your love towards them surpass your love towards Him. 

He deserves it more than they ought to. 

Because, He loves us the most.

Because I can't say it

...

  

Ienai Kara (Because I can't say it)

No matter how many times I hear that gentle melody,

I am always enveloped by the same happiness.

Every day I felt that there was something missing,

until, by chance, I met you.

 Those feelings that day, I can bring to mind anytime,

Even on rainy nights, even in my dreams; anytime at all.

But the words I want to say, I can't say them unreservedly

so I put them away in my chest, for just a while more.

The words you spoke were soft,

wrapping me like the wind.

Somehow, just with you at my side,

I feel that I can do so many things.
Because you gave me the strength to make any kind of dream come true,

I'm able to look straight ahead and start walking.

If we could be together

until the day I can say those words...

Those feelings that day, I can bring to mind anytime,

Even on rainy nights, even in my dreams; anytime at all.

But the words I want to say, I can't say them unreservedly

so I put them away in my chest, for just a while more.

Just looking straight ahead,

let's walk together.

Petite Princess Yucie (ぷちぷり＊ユーシィ, Puchi Puri Yūshī?) 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YYXx5GoUtpg

: 1st March 2010.

: Plymouth, U.K.

: To all my friends, I just want you to know that even if I don't show it, I do love all of you. 
With you by my side, I feel like I can do just anything. 
Thanks! Thanks so much for being my friends. 
You just don't know how grateful I am to have you in my life.

I miss you guys, really.

...

I really miss my school days. Oh, what a nostalgia!

Time flies quite fast isn't it?
Really, as I count back all the minutes and seconds that passed by, I couldn't believe myself that I've already grown up!
I couldn't believe myself how I have changed for these past few years.

Looking back at my old pictures with my school mates, I never stopped laughing.
Laughing at how innocent we looked,
laughing at all the stupid things that we had done,
laughing at all the ambitious and illogical dreams that we had,
laughing at all the happy, funny and embarassing moment that we had,
but,
looking back at my friends' faces, my heart never stopped aching.
I'm sad thinking about how distance makes us all apart,
I'm sad thinking about how different all of us now,
I'm sad thinking about how the memories of our happy and sad moments had slowly fading as time goes by.
I couldn't stop feeling sad thinking that the big tree that we used to held our daily 'picnic' (well, we didn't quite like rushing to the canteen, did we?) might be chopped down one day.
I couldn't stop feeling hurt thinking that I can't be there with you everytime you face problems like I used to before.
And I, I couldn't stop feeling sad, sad for not being able to hug you when you are sad.

You know, I never ever stop wishing that you would be here with me,
doing that 'neko dance', laughing at our stupid jokes, giggling over our so-called secrets and crushs,
waiting and complaining over the late bus, competing with each other over the latest news in comics and anime world, copying each other's homework and hugging each other everytime one of us is feeling down.
I never stop wishing that you would be here,
Really! You know why?
Because I miss you.

But, no matter how much I miss you, I know, deep in your heart, you miss me too.
How do I know?
We are friends, aren't we?

I hope, really really hope, that one fine day, all of us can be together again under that big tree.
Even for a while, I really hope we can meet again.
Because, I really want to hug you again.
You see, I really miss your warm hug, and your sincere smile.
That's why, no matter how much you have changed,
I really hope that your hug and smile will still remain the same.

[Oh God, please take a good care of all my friends, no matter where they are. I just want them to always be strong no matter what.]

: 1st March 2010.

: Plymouth, U.K.

: An unexpected call from one of my old classmates really touched my heart. 
I was so hurt for not being able to hug her when she had problems. 
Miss Peminat Kindaichi, be strong!