If I showed you my flaws, if I couldn't be strong, tell me honestly, would you still love me the same
"If there's anything I've learned from my recent spiritual/ religious studies and silently observing my environment, it's that when God loves you, He won't necessarily bless you in ways that are obvious or material like a new high-powered job or prestigious degrees. Instead, He will favour you in ways that make you more grounded internally and make you a better human being. He will give you a better sense of self. He will give you a better sense of self-worth. He will give you charity in knowledge. He will give you clarity in knowing Him. He will give you more opportunities to help others. And ultimately, He will give you peace of mind and a sound heart. Sometimes, His blessings are not obvious."
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Why can't anyone put them together as the main leads instead? We need villain-like couples too, not just sweet mushy pairs.
Why? So that we can see a drama where instead of evil parents or jealous frenemy, it is them who ruin each other's love life. You know, it will be so anxious and frustrating to watch how unpredictable they might be and how their ego and dark sides will test the love that they have for each other. Because, in this life, rather than other people, it is us who make it difficult for happiness to creep in our life. It is us who build walls and hurt others; just to protect our own hearts. But in the end, it is us who hurt ourselves.
See, isn't it interesting to watch this kind of drama? We need our main leads to have flaws because admit it, we all do have flaws, in our own way.
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These few days, I noticed how my dear friends are having dark days of their own. I have been there; you know, the feeling of sadness, self-pity, self-doubt and hurt even though the reasons might not be the same. Some time this week, in my English class, I taught my students of a poem entitled 'What Has Happened to Lulu?'. One of the issues in the poem is 'everyone, no matter what is their age, faces their own kind of problems'. While teaching them this, I had this realisation that yeah, we all have our own problems. For us, we find that our problem is big, and sometimes much bigger than everyone else's. When others tell us not to fret too much, we feel that it is unfair for them to say so because they don't know how we feel. That is why most of the times, we feel like people won't understand us because they are not in our shoes. However, my dear, God is fair. Whatever problem we are facing, it is because He knows that no one, except us who can bear such burden. Hence, that is why in Quran, there is a verse saying; "Allah does not burden a soul more than it can bear."
So, my dear friends, please be strong and have faith that no matter how bad it is right now, He will make sure you can go through it. I love you all the same, and while I am physically far from each of you, my prayers are just behind you. Until we meet again, do take care.
: 29th January 2016.
: 10.30 p.m.
: Jeli, Kelantan.
: Be gentle with yourself, you're doing the best you can.
